Digital Niqabi

I was reading the LA Times online, intending to link to two opinion pieces, when another headline caught my eye: Tough love ends in family tragedy. I am not a person who is too big on tough love, so this headline seemed like it would cater to my inherent biases. And it did! It certainly did. It’s an article about a 41 year old son who has a history of refusing to grow up, broke into his father’s house while the dad was on vacation, and was about to make off with a baseball cap. A neighbor heard the door of the house being kicked in, and called 911, the cops came and arrested him, and called his parents, who decided to press charges against their son because really, enough was apparently enough. Little did they know. This is what happened:

[The father] pressed charges, banking on a prosecutor’s assurance that Sean would be ordered to undergo alcohol counseling as a condition of his probation, if he was convicted.

“You don’t want to see your kid in jail,” McNamara said in a recent interview. “But I felt that him being put in rehab was going to be good for him.”

But Sean never made it to rehab.

He was nearly beaten to death in a Los Angeles County jail after being placed in dorms with about 200 fellow inmates, many of them violent members of the Southsiders gang. McNamara was attacked when the guard who was supposed to be watching them left his post.

The attack, in which inmates allegedly jumped from third-tier bunks onto his head as he lay on the floor, left him with permanent brain damage.

[...]

Sean was in jail awaiting trial at the North County Correctional Facility in Castaic, a barracks-style lockup well known for inmate brawls, when he was attacked on June 7, 2005.

He was one of a handful of white inmates in a dorm with about 200 Latinos, violent gang members among them, records show. The gang members struck when a guard left to monitor an area about 75 feet away, where he couldn’t see or hear those in McNamara’s area.

[...]
One of the inmates has since pleaded no contest to attempted murder and was sentenced to six years in state prison, according to a district attorney’s spokeswoman.

I would just like to add my opinion to all this: If this had been a person of color, and the other inmates had been white, the entire city of Los Angeles would be in flames right now. This crime definitely has overtones of being race-based, and I don’t understand how it is not being recognized as such. This is insanity, and those barbarians in that prison who did this need the death-penalty. 6 years in prison for causing somebody permanent brain damage? The bastard should fry. I know, I used a horrible word, but honestly, there isn’t another word that would apply to them.

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who was being home-schooled. This little girl used to make her mother crazy…or should I say that her mother used to get crazy without this little girl even trying. Every time they would read something in history or English, the mother would ask the little girl questions about it all. And the little girl would say “I don’t know.” The mother would ask her to write down her responses, and the little girl would sit for hours staring at the page, and write down a couple of sentences at most. This continued all the way through junior high, and the mother was beginning to worry that this will be the one child who does not go to college.

When time came for the grown up little girl to go to college, she got a huge lecture on how patient her mother had been with her, but college professors are just not the same. They will all fail her if she continues this way! This made the little girl very unhappy and afraid of college. But the little girl would not ask for help, until the night before her first paper was due! And when this first paper came due, she emailed the paper to her big sister and asked for it to be proof-read for grammar and spelling. What a paper it was! Big sister told mother the next morning, “Why were you yelling at her for not writing and talking? She writes great!”

*Perhaps not as well-written a story as the ones on my sister’s blog, but hey, at least you can be guaranteed that this story is true…and you know someone is going to be semi-outraged to read this . As such, it will be taken down in a day or so, so don’t kill me yet, lil sis.

I was looking at news from South Africa today, specifically in the crime section of the online paper. I do this sometimes to help myself remember one of the many things that I don’t miss about SA. Well, there I was, cruising down the page, when I saw that the President’s official residence in Pretoria was robbed, and the thieves made off with about 20K - 30K Rands worth of aluminum (which is about 2.6K - 3.9K US$):

the 10mm aluminium wire which had been installed in the roof over the past three weeks, formed part of a network of the house’s electronic fittings, including closed-circuit television cameras and computer systems, that was designed to protect the house against lightning.

So, that right there is pretty amazing…imagine living in a country where even the head of state’s official residence is not safe! Well, the irony of it all is this: a few years ago, Mr. Mbeki (SA’s President) said that crime in SA was not really all that it’s made out to be. Perhaps now he might change his mind? If not, then dude…what does it take?!

The lovely Umm Ibrahim has bestowed upon me the gift of a beautiful tag.

Rules:

1. ON your blog, post the Rules & 10 things you have HOPE for in your life.

2. LINK Tag 10 people (we want hope to spread people!) and LINK the person who tagged you.

3. Comment/Notify the 10 People they’ve been tagged.

I hope to:

1. learn to have better control of my temper.

2. be able to ignore silly distractions of life, and enjoy the beauty of this life instead.

3. never again be bothered by ridiculous people.

4. pay closer attention and respect to my dearest friends.

5. get a job I am happy and satisfied with.

6. live my life with dignity and strength.

7. always have Allah’s protection and guidance.

8. read Qur’aan every day…at this point, I am skipping days.

9. practice as much of Islam as I can learn.

10. die with imaan, be granted forgiveness for my many misdeeds, and have the Mothers of the Believers over for dinner with my family and friends in Jannah.

I tag: Aaminah, Digital Jewel, Queenie, Mona, asqfish, Muslim Wife, Orange Ninja Woman, Noora, Ajla, and Arab Lady.

…that the entire Ihya al ‘Uloom al Din by Imam Ghazali can be found online, here, here and here for absolutely free? Ya Rabbi, this is such a great find. I will never ever again have an excuse for not reading all of this awesome work.

What is up with Barack Obama?

Barack Obama angrily disowned his former pastor and friend of 20 years, the Rev. Jeremiah A. Wright Jr., saying Tuesday that Wright’s recent comments about race, religion and the U.S. government were “divisive and destructive” and had undermined the purpose of Obama’s presidential candidacy.

So, his Reverend of 20 years finally went on the defensive, to clear up all the stupid misconceptions about his beliefs and words. And what does Mr. Change-you-can-believe-In do? He considers it an insult to himself and his campaign. Senator, everything is not about you. Why does your Reverend not have the right to defend himself, at a time of his own choosing, from attacks that came about not at a time of either his or your choosing? If you actually expect him to sit by, mute and defenseless, then your belief in the First Amendment is extremely shallow. Beyond that, it makes you look like just another politician, because you really seem to believe in saying what you need to say to get where you want to get. What’s the difference between you and any other politician?

And the contention that his Reverend’s beliefs “undermined the purpose of his candidacy” is simply ridiculous. Since when is the Reverend part of his campaign? The Reverend has been preaching the same things for probably the entire time that Mr. Obama has been his church member. It’s awfully convenient to deny all knowledge of the Reverend’s belief system now, and its highly arrogant to believe that a pastor ought to change with the wind like politicians generally do.

Sorry, but this smacks of good old politics. And that does not sound like the kind of change I wish to believe in. Now, if only America would give Ralph Nader a chance!

Imagine that you are sitting in a lecture session by an up and coming Shaykha, you know, one of those rare Muslim women of knowledge. And this Shaykha is giving a beautiful lecture, full of Islamic wisdom and advice…and you feel your soul uplifted, you feel your Imaan boosted just by listening to her, because you know that because of her words, her knowledge of Allah and Rasulullah Sallallaahu Alayhi wa Sallam, you will leave the masjid motivated to be a better Muslim. It’s a beautiful feeling, perhaps this might be what it feels like to be high on some designer drug…but this is better, because the side effects can only be good: instead of killing brain cells, you are growing heart and soul cells.

And then, to conclude her session, the Shaykha makes a duaa, and while you are in the middle of this masjid, surrounded by a whole community of women who know you, and think they know the truth about who you are, you realize that her duaa to Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala is actually aimed at you. And you realize that she has been listening to one of your acquaintances repeat a tired old lie about you, and not only did she believe the lie, she went one step further: she cast a judgment…and now she is publicly humiliating you before your friends and before Allah.

She did not bother to (since the matter concerned her so very deeply) ask to hear the other side. She did not bother to stick to her topic. She did not even bother to consider the impact her action would have on somebody whose imaan might not be as strong as it could, on somebody who is struggling to find a) true guidance, and b) a saheeh role model. No no no…stopping to consider what she was really doing was beneath her. Because, she, the Shaykha, knows everything she needs to know, because she, the Shaykha, knows that all that glitters certainly must be gold.

She, the Shaykha, did not even know that 2 hours before her duaa of humiliation, she was eating a dinner prepared by her victim. I wonder what tasted better to the eminent Shaykha, the flesh of the sister who was gossiped about and then so thoroughly humiliated, or the sister’s cooking.

Are we in a time when our scholars are leading in ignorance? If this is the state of our ‘ulema, are we better of without them? How on earth do we, as Muslims who are seeking knowledge of our amazing faith, have any kind of faith in those who are supposed to be the inheritors of our Nabi Sallallaahu Alayhi wa Sallam? The worst kind of jaahilyaat surely comes from those who are supposed to know better.

May Allah forgive us all, and may He have mercy on those of us who are being led by scholars of ignorance. Ameen.

Seriously, I am so done with the topic of marriage. Everyone, just chill out. Mother, stop talking about those weirdos. Bro, stop stressing out that I let a “good catch” go, and maybe we can do something to bring it back. You’re making me crazy, you’re making me want to fly in the rings of Jupiter. I am going absolutely nuts with you all obsessing about these users and losers of humanity.

Don’t worry. I am happy with my decision. I am at peace. I look in front of me and see a future that is my own. I look behind me and see a life that has been blessed in all ways, big and small. If there is ever a man who can accept my good and help me overcome my bad qualities, and make me as happy as I would make him, then that would be awesome. But if not, then my life is just lovely…it’s complication-free, and allows me to focus on me, you, and all that is holy. By the grace of Allah, there is nothing wrong with my life. Now move on. Just please please please move on before I snap into a million particles of fiery nomadic dust!

…test my politeness. I find it very easy to let go of rude people. I do expect to be treated with the same courtesy I give others. So chillax on the rudeness. Especially if you call yourself Muslim.

I found this quote from Sayyidina Ali RadiAllahu Anhu, which so relates to my feelings right now:

Unfortunate is he who cannot gain a few sincere friends during his life and more unfortunate is the one who has gained them and then lost them (through his deeds).

So, here I am sitting with a headful of henna, because I will never dye my hair with anything chemical. My mother has managed to instill this fear of cancer thru hair dye in me, and I even sometimes buy dye thinking I can get over this fear. But I always end up exchanging the dye for lipstick. But a girl has to mess with her hair every now and then, right? So, what is better than henna? Yes, it’s messy. Yes, it might leave behind barely a hint of color. Yes, it will make you feel a bit cold (I guess mud on your head would be cooling, eh?). But! Will it give you cancer and cause you to live with tons of pain, and die without any hair? I don’t think so!

I have experimented with so many formulations for the perfect henna solution, and so far the one I am currently using is the best yet. What’s the recipe, some may ask? A twig’s worth of sage leaves and about a dozen rosemary leaves boiled in a pot of water until the water turns a lovely golden brown. Take about 3/4 cup of this water, mix in your fresh henna until it’s pasty. Add a 1/4 teaspoon of tea tree oil (a terpene that helps set the color faster and darker), and 1 tablespoon of vinegar. Let the mixture sit for a bit, till you see the color of the solution be more orange-y than green…and then slather it on!

I am letting it sit on my hair for about 4 hours, but I think a couple of hours would be enough, too. I can hardly wait to wash this out. I think it’s always the suspense of “will the color take or not” which makes it sooooo much more difficult to wait.